So much has happened that I don't even know where to start. Most of you know all the news from facebook, but as the blog is something that I will keep forever I thought I would write an entry, so I can remember further down the track.
Harry is doing well, and is currently in Year 7 at CBC Fremantle. He is enjoying school and the new challenges that senior school brings. We had a parent teacher meeting last term and I showed Harrys xrays to his sports teacher as it is very difficult to explain what has been done, and most people have no idea as to the extent of the surgery. The one teacher didn't even know there was anything wrong with his arm, and the other one explained that he did know as Harry had told him. Harry said he couldn't do something because of his shoulder, and the teacher asked what was wrong with his shoulder, to which Harry apparently replied 'I don't have one!' I suppose that certainly would leave you in doubt as to what the problem was. He has been playing tennis for Melville in the winter penance, and is enjoying this. It is great to see him playing sport and getting on with life.
Ellie is now in Year 3, and the split year 3 / year 4 class at school. She enjoys school and is thankfully quite smart, and likes to learn, so we just have to hope she keeps up her enthusiasm. She is still doing WA stage school, and also started gymnastics last year and is doing competitions and badge tests throughout the year. She is definitely not going to be a wallflower, and I am hoping she is going through the teen age stage early. You know the answering back, and being defiant stage everyone talks about.
We also have a new edition to the family, and her name is Hollie. Yes, surprise surprise, here i was planning my 40th party, when along came a little surprise. She was born on New Years Eve, (by choice) and was 7lb 5ozs, and 52cm's long. I have to say she is an absolutely joy. She is calm, chilled, and sleeps well. Finally I got it right! Nothing like me, and actually nothing like Harry or Ellie, which is probably a good thing as I wouldn't have survived if she didn't sleep!! She is adored by all, and her first sentence will probably be, 'stop kissing me', as she is kissed from morning to night.
Sadly Sam the dog, got hit by a car last year, and is no longer with us. It was extremely sad, but luckily the children didn't see it happen. We have no plans to get another dog at this stage, so I suppose it will be a case of watch this space.
In the last few months, we have been on a couple of camps with camp quality. We were lucky enough to get to go to Rottnest for the weekend, and both Harry and Ellie went on an overnight camp. Ellie went to Woodman point and being a younger age group they just had the one night there. Harry went to Erin Halliday and they stayed there for 4 days. They both had an absolutely fabulous time and can't wait to go to the next one. They are such a fabulous organisation and do so much for the children. It is also great to catch up with people you have met on the ward and to see how they are going, and meet new friends. All of the children have their own companions when they go, so as you can imagine there are a lot of people who volunteer and give up their time. One of the volunteers is actually working at Attadale Primary School, as a relief teacher, and he is also a fireman. I am sure he must have some faults. Harrys camp went to the Dockers game, Cirque De Soleil, Adventure World, Bowling, they did crazy art and cartooning. They went to the movies, and they also had a big disco in the city, and there are other things which I am sure I have forgotten. I know some people think this might be over the top, but these children have been through so much that the laughter and fun camp quality give back to them is totally and utterly incredible. It also gives them the opportunity to mix with either children who have been through treatment or their siblings (as they are also invited on camps - as they suffer as well) and not feel like they have to explain anything. Camp quality you are truly amazing!
PMH, Ward 3B and childhood cancer have become such a big part of our lives. We recently said farewell to David McLaughlin, who passed away after a long battle with Leukaemia. His mother Anne, and I used to share a vodka or two when we were on the ward. The funeral was beautiful, and the staff from 3B said a few words. They talked about Davids 3B family and it made you realise that we do become extended family. We spend so much time together when the children go through treatment that it is totally understandable. I suppose the other thing is that unless you have a child diagnosed with cancer, then you really don't have any idea what it is like. This isn't a bad thing, as it would really be nicer not to understand what it is like, it just means that sometimes you talk to other cancer families as they really do understand.
Sadly today we said farewell to Harvey the Cure-ageous Lion. He was son to Gabe and Cassie, and brother to Oliver and Genevieve. The funeral was beautiful, whilst at the same time understandably very emotional. Cassie also writes a blog and the title after Harvey passed was 'it wasn't meant to be like this,' which basically sums it all up. I remember saying to my Dad when Harry had been diagnosed, that I just wanted someone to ring me up and say 'sorry this isn't your journey, we got the tapes mixed up, and Harry doesn't really have cancer!' Sadly this phone call never came.
We shouldn't be going to childrens funerals, and children shouldn't be diagnosed with cancer. It does make you wonder who is watching over us, as why do they let this happen? I just can't imagine the feeling of losing your child, and can only imagine that I would spend the rest of my life in denial. People say to you when your child is diagnosed with cancer, 'you are so brave', 'I would have just gone to pieces' or 'I couldn't have coped', well you have to, your child needs you and sadly you have to put on a brave face. I can only hope that when a child passes the family finds even more strength to help them get through this loss.
Recently so many of our brave 3B children have relapsed. To be told your child has cancer is bad enough, but to be told it has come back again is unthinkable. Sadly though, this is the reality of the cancer journey. I know that as parents of 3B we call it scanxiety. Every few months you have more scans and the worry and nerves start, until you finally get to the results. I remember being asked 'are you worried?' and I said 'no as Harry will be fine, and if he isn't you will find me on the floor with a bottle of vodka!' How ever hard you try not to worry and you say you are fine, you will always find yourself short tempered, snapping without reason, or generally just shitty with the world, and then you realise it is scan time!
On a more positive note, Harry was interviewed on today / tonight about the bone bank (now called Plus Life), and hopefully they will show the interview soon. He came out with some classic comments during the interview. They asked lots of questions about the treatment, the surgery, etc etc. After the interview, they got him to walk out of the house and do some jumping on the trampoline to show him doing day to day activities. Then they asked him to re-do it, and as he was walking back into the house he turned to the camera man and said 'do you mind not filming my house number, as I don't want any old randoms turning up?' He obviously thinks that once he has been on the tv people will be trying to find out where we live!! It makes me smile as there has been so much publicity about the hospital in the last few weeks, and talk of it being third world, well lets hope they play all the interview, as Harry didn't see it that way at all. He didn't enjoy being in hospital but he made the most out of a bad situation. He said he made a lot of friends there and we had fun! Got to love a childs perspective, having said that we always tried to have a laugh and keep the mood as light as possible. Bingo on a Friday, when we were in Room 7. As soon as one child won bingo, we would run and photocopy the sheet and say everyone in the room won! Don't tell anyone thought as they might want their prizes back!!!
To all those still travelling this journey, stay strong, and keep smiling. Thanks for all the love and support along the way xx
Lovely blog Vic - congratulations Harry on the three year mark - and thanks Vic for some positivity concerning 3B. We all know it's no ones favorite place - and for a very good reason. But the "third world" comments are neither helpful or realistic!! We get to become very fond of our 3B kids and really do feel that they become part of our "family" - it's not a club anyone would voluntarily become a member of, we know, but I think everyone on the ward does their best to be their best. Go Harry - keep flying the flag for the survivors!!
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